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Rotten Fruit

Last summer, Joshua and I enjoyed eating BELTs. (Bacon, Egg, Lettuce, Tomato). The sandwiches tasted even better with our home-grown tomatoes. I was excited today to go out on my balcony and harvest the first fruits.

The tomatoes were small, which surprised me, but since they appeared so nice and red, I figured it was time to pick them. They looked so good.

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But as soon as I picked the first one I realized something was very wrong.

It was too squishy. I looked at the bottom and saw a big, dark, rotting spot. I picked another, and another. They all had the same rotten bottom. I was crushed.

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What went wrong?

I searched for answers and found out that my circumstance was not unique. In fact, it is quite a common malady for tomatoes. It’s called blossom-end rot, which is why it happened at the bottom of the fruit, where the blossom was. It’s caused by calcium deficiency, which can happen when the roots are unable to transport the needed calcium to the fruit. The culprit is usually inconsistent watering. The plant has been watered too much, or not enough. Heavy rain, or severe drought. It has been a hot summer, and while I thought I was giving my tomatoes enough water, it wasn’t sufficient.

As soon as I suffered this blow to my gardening pride, I figured there must be a spiritual lesson here. I thought of my two favorite tree passages, Psalm 1 and Jeremiah 17:5-8. In both of these passages, the tree is planted by a river or a stream. A consistent water source. When drought and heat come, the tree has no need to fear, and it won’t stop yielding fruit.

Good fruit. Not rotten fruit.

These trees are compared to people who delight in God’s Word and are constantly meditating on it. They trust in the Lord, because they’re continually turning their heart to Him. These people are getting enough sustenance to make it through, even when hard times come. Because we know there are dry times in every person’s life – times of heat and trial. But if our roots are stretched out into that constant, cool, refreshing stream of life – God’s Word – we will be able to endure and bear fruit even in difficult times.

So that’s my challenge – to myself, and to you. Are we constantly reading and meditating on God’s Word? Are we seeking Him daily, or are there days (or weeks) where we don’t? If we get out of the habit of looking to the Lord, it won’t be long before the effects show. Consistency is key in growth. My other favorite gardening passage (John 15) makes it crystal clear: if we abide in Christ, we will bear much fruit.

Good fruit.

Ready & Radiant

I wasn’t a girl who dreamt about her wedding day.

Growing up with 3 older brothers, I was more of a tomboy.

Give me jeans and sneakers, not dresses and heels.

So by the time I was engaged and had to pick out a wedding dress,

I was lost.

I had to learn a whole new vocabulary:

A-line, sheath, tea-length, empire, trumpet – isn’t that an instrument?

I also didn’t have a lot of time, since we decided on a short engagement.

Thanks to some helpful ladies in my life,

I finally found a dress.

But it wasn’t perfect.

In fact, there was a lot of work to do.

One of the layers of material was yellowed – for an antique look.

The upper part of the dress (vocab word: bodice) needed a makeover.

It also was much too floofy (never learned the technical term for that one!)

Even though I had the dress, it needed to be transformed.

Thankfully, I had a dear relative who was creative, speedy, and amazing at tailoring.

By the time the wedding day arrived, the dress was ready.

Perfect.

Never in my life had I felt so beautiful.

I had my hair and makeup done,

but until I put on that white dress,

it wasn’t clear who was the bride.

As soon as I did, everyone knew.

The bride was ready.

And she was radiant.

photo by Ruth Susanna

As excited as I was to be marrying my earthly groom,

Both of us were looking forward to another wedding.

We knew this was a picture.

A gorgeous, sweet picture of what’s to come.

One day, a completely radiant Bride will be presented to her Groom.

Her dress will be spotless. Perfect. No wrinkles.

Bright and clean.

That day will be sheer joy.

But until then, it’s clear there’s work to do.

The Bride’s dress isn’t ready yet.

There are some big stains and holes… clearly there are repairs to do.

Bitterness, division, fear, anger, lust.

Major tailoring needs to happen.

But He’s working on it.

And He’s amazing at what He does.

My groom, Joshua, wasn’t the one to fix up my dress.

But Christ is the One sanctifying His bride.

He’s at work – making us holy and blameless.

The day I walked down the aisle to Joshua was emotional.

My tears threatened to ruin my mascara, but I didn’t care.

It was the moment I’d been waiting for, and he had, too.

My eyes well up with the same emotion as I think of that day to come.

When we walk to our Bridegroom.

What anticipation, what joy, as He receives us.

He’s been waiting and working earnestly, and now we’re ready.

His Bride.

Spotless.

Perfect.

Radiant.

Because of Him.

Beloved

It doesn’t seem right at first.

Is God playing favorites?

Does He really love one and think less of another?

Why?

A puzzling situation happened in 2 Samuel.

A second son was born to King David and his wife Bathsheba.

A lot of ugliness had happened before this,

but David had repented and found peace with God.

That’s what David named the child. Solomon. Peace.

But God gave the boy a different name.

Jedidiah. Beloved of the Lord.

You see, God loved this child.

My gut reaction is to question Him and His love.

Do you mean You didn’t love David and Bathsheba’s first child?

Did this baby somehow earn Your love in a way another child couldn’t?

I start thinking about all the other possibilities,

Fixating on degrees of love,

And end up missing the main point.

God loved him.

Period.

God doesn’t tell us why.

Just that He loved him.

Then it dawns on me.

He loves me, too.

Period.

I haven’t done anything to earn His love.

In fact, I what I have done should garner the exact opposite reaction from Him.

But God’s love is not contingent on me and my actions.

He loves because of who He is.

My name might as well be Jedidiah.

And yours, too.

Because God deeply cherishes each one of us.

He so loved the world.

If you’re questioning His love for you,

Look up the word “Beloved” in the Bible and read about it.

It’s peppered all thoughout.

That’s because of who He is:

Love.

So let’s love Him today, who first loved us.

I am my Beloved’s, and my Beloved is mine.

Jedidiah

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Remembered and Visited.

It’s easy to forget.

When you’re not seeing someone everyday,

When you’re not talking to them up frequently,

When you’re not praying for them regularly…

It’s easy to wake up one day and think,

Oh! I haven’t checked in with so-and-so in a long time.

We can forget.

But God doesn’t.

Hannah thought she had been forgotten by God.

She desperately wanted a child, but God had closed her womb.

In tears she goes to God and cries out for Him to remember her.

If you give me a son, I will give him back to You.

I don’t know when Hannah realized it,

but soon enough she found out that God hadn’t forgotten her.

He wasn’t jolted by her cries to action – He hadn’t been asleep.

He had known her struggle all along.

He remembered – He thought upon her.

And He gave her a son.

Samuel – heard of God.

Hannah gave Samuel back to the Lord as she said she would.

The day she left her young son at the temple to serve the Lord, she burst into song:

…There is no one besides You,

Nor is there any rock like our God…

For the LORD is a God of knowledge…

She knew that God had known about her struggle all along.

And some time later (maybe even years), God visited her again.

He took note of her! Once again He attended to her.

She became the mother of five more children.

How kind God was to Hannah.

He remembered and thought upon her.

He heard her cries and answered.

He visited her again and gave her more children.

Don’t you think He remembers you, too?

Since before you were born, He knew you.

His eyes are always upon you; He’s constantly checking your heart.

He knows the hairs on your head.

Don’t think for one minute that God doesn’t think about you constantly:

His thoughts toward you are more than the grains of sand on the seashore.

He is worthy of all our praise.

Let’s remember Him, as He remembers us.

Actively think on Him today.

Take note and thank Him for His kindness.

Let’s turn our minds and hearts to Him.

He’s so good.


Hannah is one of my favorite people mentioned in the Bible. God used her in an amazing way, despite her difficult circumstances. I go more in depth with her story in the devotional book Persevere: Comfort and Hope for Dark Days.​

Roots

The roots of a tree are powerful.
Venture down a shady sidewalk and you might trip on a concrete slab that a root has heaved.


In 2013, I visited the remains of Machu Picchu in Peru.
Abandoned centuries ago, trees and bushes climbed over the buildings.
Invading roots and vines twined around everything.
They overtook the village completely.
But when Machu Picchu was “discovered,” the roots and vines were pulled out.
When people cleaned up the ruins, this wall partially collapsed.

The roots were gone, and it was weakened.

Our hearts can be the same.
Pride and self subversively twine around the heart, invading and overtaking.
Roots of bitterness powerfully force their way in.

We can stay like that, overtaken.
Or we can call out to God.

Lord, pull out those roots.
Rip out the pride and selfishness that tries to choke.
Untangle the root of bitterness.
Make me broken and weak.

[The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit;
a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise.]

No one likes to be weak.
Nobody wants to admit that they need God.
But that’s the road to healing.
Knowing our brokenness leads us to the One who can fix us.

Oh Lord, fill the holes and cracks that remain.
In my broken places, fill me with Your Spirit, so I can go on in Your strength.



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Immediately

Immediately.
That’s how we want things done.
Right. Now.
Yet, many times what we want doesn’t happen immediately.
We have to wait and exercise those patience muscles.

In the waiting, it’s easy to doubt God.
Are you toying with me?
I know that You can do this thing now.
Why are You delaying?

We see the situation, but forget our vision is limited.
We don’t see the whole picture.
God is all-knowing, wise, and good.
He has a reason for having us wait.

But there are times where God acts immediately.
And I love that.

I recently read in Matthew 14 where Jesus walks on water.
He had sent his disciples on before Him in the boat.
He had stayed behind for some alone time – to pray.

The wind picked up and the disciples spent hours battling the waves.
I wonder if they thought about Jesus…
Where is He?
What is He doing?
Why isn’t He here to help us?

Jesus didn’t come right away.
But He did come.
Walking on the water.

The disciples were terrified when they saw Him,
but immediately Jesus called out to them.
“Take courage! It is I, do not be afraid.”

He wasn’t playing with their emotions.
He wasn’t amused at their terror.
He reassured them instantly.

Then when Peter came walking out to Him,
And he saw the wind and became afraid.
He started to sink and cried out, “Lord, save me!”

Immediately Jesus reached out and grabbed him.
He didn’t lecture Peter or let him sink a bit more.
He quickly stretched out His hand and lifted him up.

I love these instances where Jesus acted immediately.
He soothed their fears and calmed their anxiety.
He lifted up the doubting, falling disciple.
And He did it immediately.

So maybe you’re wondering why the Lord is having you wait on something.
I couldn’t tell you why.
But if you’re worried about the situation,
Anxious about what is to come,
Or doubting the Lord’s goodness,
Cry out to Him.

He will come to your aid immediately.



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Heart Disease

In case your Cheerios box didn’t tell you, heart disease is the leading cause of death in the United States.
According to the CDC, one in four deaths are attributed to some sort of heart condition.

That’s troubling.
Many campaigns have been started to promote healthy habits and active living.
We need our hearts to be as fit as possible to keep living longer.

But this is actually a secondary problem.
There’s something more grave and serious happening today.
It’s not just our physical hearts that are at risk, but our spiritual hearts.

When the Son of God came to earth, He diagnosed spiritual health issues.
People flocked to hear Him, but they weren’t really listening.
They watched His miracles, but they didn’t really see Him.
Jesus saw that their hearts had become dull.

He referenced an ancient prophecy:

“You will keep on hearing, but will not understand.
You will keep on seeing, but will not perceive.

For the heart of this people has become dull,
With their ears they scarcely hear,
And they have closed their eyes.

Otherwise, they would see with their eyes,
Hear with their ears,
And understand with their heart and return,
And I would heal them.”

Matthew 13:15 (from Isaiah 6:10)

The heart of this people has become dull.

That word “dull” is translated from a Greek word that means thick, hardened, or fatty.
Imagine a layer of fat encasing the heart.
It makes the heart calloused and untouchable.

Spiritual heart disease seems to be as rampant today as physical heart disease.
Instead of hearts that are tender toward God and can respond easily to His word,
Hearts are dull and insensitive.
The fat has been built up until there’s no way to get through.

Shutting out the Word of God has only one outcome: Death.

So how’s your spiritual heart today?
Have you been exercising and keeping the fat away?
Are you seeking God, looking and listening to Him?
Or have you shut Him out, and let the fat creep over your heart?

Just like it’s not too late to start healthy habits for your physical heart,
It’s not too late to turn to the Great Physician.

Look, hear, understand with your heart.
Return and be healed.

Welcome the Ants

The peony has become one of my favorite flowers.
They start out kinda ugly.
Red stalks come out of the ground, and you wonder what will ever become of them.
Then, suddenly it seems, the red transforms to green and huge buds form.
One day, BOOM – the pink, white, or purple petals pop.
But the stunning petals stay tightly bound.
They need some help to open up.

Peonies remind me of my grandma Carol.
Bushes of the pink blooms swayed for years at the farm where she lived a season of her fragrant life.
In her late twenties, she already had raised her little brothers and was caring for her own husband and 5 kids on a shoestring budget.

She did not have an easy life.
I know she had deep joys and deep heartaches and I wish I could talk to her now.
If I could, I would ask her about how each trial she endured changed her.

You see, these pink peonies share similarities with my grandma.
These gorgeous blooms emit a sweet nectar that attracts ants.
Big, black, fearsome ants.
These ants barge their way in to harvest the nectar.
But when they do, they actually serve to open up the tight petals of the flower.
The ants make the flower more open, more vulnerable, more beautiful.

I think that’s what happened to my grandma.
She had many trials in life, and as unwelcome and fearsome as they may have been, they changed her.
They forced her to open up her guarded petals, to diffuse more of her Savior’s sweet scent to the world around her.
This was a continual process in her life, until her flower faded and drooped, bowed down and broken by ALS.
Such a short season.

Though I can’t talk to her about it now, it’s clear her time on earth gave much honor to God.
I love to hear people talk about her and how special she was to them.
Her life touched so many while she was here on earth.
I know she is bursting even more gloriously in the eternal garden.

So when trials and difficulties come barging into in my life,
Undesirable as they may seem,
I will remember the peonies.
I will remember my grandma.
I will remember my Savior.

And I will welcome the ants.

Growth Rates

His lessons are all around us.

I find out that when I unplug and look, I see and understand so much more of Him.

So lately, instead of putting earbuds in while I walk (even if I’m listening to sermons or worship music or whatever else that is uplifting),

I’ve just been watching.

And what I see makes my own lips praise Him.

On a recent walk, I noticed the trees.

Some of them still have baby leaves.

So tiny, they don’t give any shade yet.

Other trees already have fully developed leaves.

They’re light green and fresh, because they’re new, and they create a nice circle of shade under the tree (see picture!).

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These two trees are planted right next to each other.

They’ve had the same amount of sunshine, same amount of rain, same amount of wind, and yet their leaves look different.

That’s because they’re different trees.

I couldn’t tell you what kind of trees they are, but clearly they are different.

From the bark, to the girth of the tree, to the shape of the leaf,

you can see marked differences.

Aren’t people the same way?

We look at each other and compare ourselves to each other.

You seem to have it all together.

You’re doing such great things with your life.

But look at me.

There’s nothing going for me.

I have so far to go.

I’ll never catch up to you.

Or the converse:

Wow, what’s wrong with you?

You should really get it together.

You’re still messing up so often.

You’re so immature.

Both comparisons are incredibly damaging.

We look at each other and forget that we are different people.

We only see the outside, and forget about the inside.

We’re so busy looking around at each other, we don’t look up to the One who created us.

God has made us differently, and He works with us differently.

He knows our individual strengths and weaknesses.

What comfort to know that the Master Gardener is in charge of us.

He will monitor our growth, because He gives us the growth.

And He will prune and tend to each of us as we have need.

Instead of looking at others with despairing or disparaging eyes,

Let’s look up and thank our faithful, patient Father.

For I am confident of this very thing, that He who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus.

Philippians 1:6

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Making Mountains out of Molehills

I’ve been making mountains out of molehills lately.

It’s not that the molehills aren’t there.

They are.

It’s that I’m considering them to be so much greater than they are.

There are things in life that are irritating, like a sliver that needles into your heart.

It grows to be uncomfortable.

Then it’s inflamed.

It becomes painful.

Unbearable.

Moments that are real and raw pile up and grow bigger, and bigger, and bigger.

In fact, the more I look at my suffering, it metastasizes.

The molehill that could be crushed by my foot has skyrocketed into a towering mountain.

All I can do is stare at the sheer face of the cliff and crumple in despair.

And then the Lord brings a verse to mind.

For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory that is to be revealed to us.

Romans 8:18

Now, usually, I don’t try to measure my suffering against someone else’s. I’ve learned over the years that the Lord has made us differently with different paths and different loads to bear.

Yet, I can’t help comparing my suffering with the man who the Lord used to write this verse.

Paul’s suffering was physical, mental, and spiritual. He endured years of trials. Beatings, hunger, sleeplessness, shipwreck, betrayal, rejection, stoning… just to name a few. His suffering surely was greater than mine is. 

Yet, through the Spirit, he can write that the sufferings of his present time were not worthy to be compared to glory.

Instead of focusing on the suffering, he focuses on the glory.

Paul’s not making a mountain out of a molehill.

He doesn’t even look at that molehill.

He looks up for the glory. The glory of God.

The glory of Christ which will be shared with us.

What a perspective!

With that outlook, I’m not making much of my suffering, but making much of my God!

It encourages me, even in my moments of hardship.

Because even though those moments are real, raw, and painful…

They aren’t to be compared with the glory that is to come.

So I’m taking my eyes off of the molehill.

I’m lifting my eyes off the horizon, 

and up to Him.

Therefore if you have been raised up with Christ, keep seeking the things above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God.

Set your mind on the things above, not on the things that are on earth.

For you have died and your life is hidden with Christ in God.

When Christ, who is our life, is revealed, then you also will be revealed with Him in glory.

Colossians 3:1-4